yosefblog

“McGaye brings up a point not only for children, but a question we, as adults, should pay attention to”

this, estaría allí en un latido del corazón.

for all of you who could never get that tweety bird over the glass boundary.

the real indiana jones is planning to excavate the ark of the covenant this summer, after receiving the blessing of an unnamed kabbalist.

Never fear my little cinefiles, it is I, Julian Thuan, the Child of Light and Beauty, and I am back to tell you that, as an esteemed member of the press, I had the remarkable opportunity to screen the wildly anticipated SISTERHOOD OF TRAVELING PANTS. Well Sir, let me tell you, YOUR pants better be traveling to see this touching and poignant dramedy! AND YOU BETTER BE IN THEM!

THE SISTERHOOD OF TRAVELING PANTS (or STP, as I have coined it) is based on the young adult book of the same name, by the always tantalizing wordsmith Anne Brashares. As four best friends spend their first summer apart from one another since their beautiful friendship began, they share a magical pair of jeans. Despite being of various shapes and sizes, each one of them fits PERFECTLY into the pants! Lena, the introvert of the group, visits her grandparents in Greece and meets Kostos, a swarthy Greek studmuffin. Tibby, the artsy-fartsy nerd, remains at home, films an artsy-fartsy movie (on VIDEO!), and befriends a young girl named Bailey. Bridget, the resident hottie, goes to soccer camp in Mexico and falls in love with Mexican soccer sensation Eric, one of the coaches at the camp! BUENO! And the plus-sized plumper Carmen visits her big fat daddy in South Carolina and finds out a super-sized shocking secret! To keep in touch, the girls pass the pair of pants to each other (via post), as well as wonderfully articulated correspondence about the adventures they are going through while apart and while wearing the jeans. You know what they say: Distance, and a sassy pair of amazing pants, make the heart grow fonder… and my heart grew ten sizes in that cinemaplex!

From the wonderful acting ability of these talented young women, to the skillful cinematography and lighting, this movie is absolutely stunning. If a filmstrip is indeed a blank canvas, director Ken Kwapis and director of photography John Bailey have painted a MASTERPIECE!

If you grew up a young girl or pansexual on Earth or on Furvormuneria, respectively, this movie WILL pluck your heart-strings (figuratively and literally, respectively). If not, this is still one laugh-out-loud hankie-soaker coming of age flick that you don’t want to miss. So pre-buy your tickets today, because these seats will sell FAST FAST FAST!!! Let’s start a little chant, shall we? Go see STP! Go see STP! Go see STP! Hooray!

Until next week! Or maybe I’ll see you sooner than you think… AT THE MOVIES!

some weirdo is giving away a weird piece of art to the weirdo who wants it the most. convince him you are that [latter] weirdo.

let’s see some yosefblog representation at the new yorker caption contest.

Again I must appeal to you wise and loyal yosefblogians (perk up your ears, Mr. Thuan) for ethical/philosophical clarification. Over lunch Jazmin and I had a heated discussion about when a captain might be morally bound to go down with his or her ship.

I am confounded because I see multiple directions in which we could explode this problematic question. How big must a ship be before this rule obtains, or does it apply equally to a dinghy as to a battle-cruiser? Does this apply to air, space, or star-ships? Do pirates follow this rule? … I’m in serious need of some deobfuscation. -MM

here’s a nice list of various methods of ordering food at a restaurant.

I’ve become very disappointed with www.howstuffworks.com

I was first introduced to this site by my brother Matthew and I was amazed. But now it seems like it’s just a joke.

If you don’t believe me, check this out. I expected to finally have a true understanding of how the body suit keeps him alive, but I feel as if I’ve wasted all this time reading stupid dialogue just so we could all see how clever the creators of this webpage are. Nice job guys! With all that time I wasted I could’ve learned more about the diatium power cells in lightsabres